Spoilers ahead! Here is the text log that convinced me that we needed to discuss all of the Michael Bay Transformers films: Space Cow – 12/23/2017 also watching transformers last knight this movie is as dumb as the others for some reason hot rod has a really racist french accent ClockwurkeBear – 12/23/2017 I forgot those movies happened? Space Cow – 12/23/2017 also turns out shia lebouf’s character is related to merlin also this movie has king arthur in it? ClockwurkeBear – 12/23/2017 no I refuse Space Cow – 12/23/2017 and bumblebee kills some nazis ClockwurkeBear – 12/23/2017 I would too Space Cow – 12/23/2017 anthony hopkins is also related to merlin and has a psychotic clockwork robot and he keeps arthur’s round table in his basement which also the knights of cybertron sit around excalibur was an laien artifact as was merlin’s staff anyway mark walberg is the titular Last Knight he was picked by a dying robot also the round table is an alien artifact hahhaha f*** so they’re all cornered and then hot rod says “i have a gun that can stop time” and traps everone in a time distortion bubble literally he just pulls a time stopping gun out of his ass and the problem is instantly solved and also EARTH IS UNICRON and now they’re on a transformer sub and this english woman is getting it to take them to merlin’s staff ClockwurkeBear – 12/23/2017 This sounds like a fever dream Space Cow – 12/23/2017 it feels like one now having some epic sub battles that ended instantly the robot is on the sub with them and making them a last supper before they die oh also hitler was killed by a transformer stonehenge is the center of unicron(edited) cybertron has destroyed the moon it will collide with the earth in 12 hours mark wahlberg is getting followed by a secret seal team into an alien ship on the bottom of the ship they found merlin’s tomb in the alien ship the tomb didn’t have his staff in it i’m guessing the stick is imerlin’s staff but like transformed yep it only responds to merlins’ dna so the descendant of merlin can wield it now a bunch of zombie transformers are killing the seals yelling PROTECT THE STAFF optimus prime has taken the staff and also he’s evil because the transformers god made him evil […]
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