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Does your child show behaviors like envy, anger, anxiety, sadness, depression, loneliness, isolation, or even avoidance? Does your child have lower self-esteem and negative self-talk?

If so, you definitely want to tune in to today's episode. My guest, Ashley Gobeil, is no stranger to frequent listeners of the Soaring Child podcast, and we are excited once again to welcome her back. Ashley is a highly experienced therapist. She has a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology, a Masters in Social Health & Counseling, and a Masters of Social Work Qualifying. She has also completed a range of certifications on family therapy, developmental trauma, attachment theory, and more.\xa0

Ashley works in a variety of contexts including childcare, schools, child and adolescent mental health, domestic and family violence, family divorce, and childhood trauma. She has specific experience with children who have been given the diagnoses of ADHD, ODD and learning difficulties. She also shares her knowledge with other professionals in the sector by running a variety of educational training programs.

Ashley joins the show today to talk about the connection between shame and ADHD and to help parents learn how to navigate the delicate balance between correcting behavior while also accepting a child for who they are and building up their self-esteem.\xa0

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Here are the links mentioned in the episode:\xa0

Facebook Live Training with Ashley Gobeil - https://www.facebook.com/groups/AdhdAnxietyParentSupport/posts/1714596859061138/\xa0

Grab our ADHD-specific parenting online course for 50% off through Sep 15, 2023 - https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parenting-adhd

*Coupon Code: DANA50

Downloadable tips to build self esteem in children: https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/opt-in-free-resource-self-esteem-4-kids\xa0

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Key Takeaways:

[2:41] The connection between shame & ADHD

[4:50] Signs that indicate children are experiencing deep shame

[5:07] The Shield of Shame

[10:08] How parents can help kids who are experiencing shame

[16:51] What to do when kids escalate or get angry when parents try to hold space for strong feelings

[24:34] What parents can do to improve self-esteem & help kids who are experiencing shame

[27:07] Why it\u2019s important to not use praise too much

[29:09] The Love Languages

[33:17] Key topics covered inside the ADHD Thrive Jumpstart 4 Parenting Program

[35:55] Final tips for parents to help kids experiencing shame

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Memorable Moments:

\u201cWhen we say \u2018shame,' it\u2019s their negative self-talk, and it seems to be very common with ADHD.\u201d

\u201cBy the age of 10, kids with ADHD have received 20,000 more negative messages than their peers.\u201d

\u201dThere seems to be quite a strong relationship between shame and ADHD that develops over time.\u201d

\u201cThe feeling of shame is different from guilt. Guilt is, \u2018I\u2019ve done something wrong. My behavior was wrong.\u2019 Whereas, shame is, \u2018I\u2019m bad.\u2019\u201d

\u201cThere\u2019s 4 categories of behavior that sit on that shield (of shame): minimizing\u2026blame\u2026denying\u2026and rage.\u201d

\u201dWe want to just accept where they\u2019re at, in that moment, without wanting to move them too quickly into reassurance.\u201d

\u201cWhen that child is experiencing shame, they really need to experience us as holding the space for them to experience that.\u201d

\u201dVulnerability and shame\u2026they sit together.\u201d

\u201dSome children, in particular where there has been a developed sense of shame or poor sense of self or lower self-esteem, receiving help can be pretty tricky as well.\u201d

\u201cYou absolutely can support your child to develop a more positive sense of self.\u201d

\u201cWe can shift their trajectory. It doesn\u2019t mean they\u2019re going to be struggling forever. We can support them to develop a more positive view\u2026of who they are.\u201d

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How to Connect with Ashley Gobeil

Follow Ashley on Instagram : https://www.instagram.com/ashleychildtherapies/\xa0

Jumpstart for Parenting program: https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parenting-adhd (Use code DANA50 for 50% off now through Sep 15th)\xa0

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Dana Kay Resources:

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Website: https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/\xa0

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/\xa0

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/\xa0

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute\xa0

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/\xa0

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/\xa0

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute\xa0

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International Best Selling Book, Thriving with ADHD \u2013 https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/\xa0

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Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl\xa0

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ADHD Parenting Course \u2013 https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parenting-adhd - Coupon code for 50% off through Sep 15, 2023 DANA50

ADHD Thrive Method 4 Kids Program \u2013 https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/packages/

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