768: How Your Lack of Transparency Is Harmful to Others
For years I tried to attain what my mentors had.\xa0I assumed that once you got to a certain place in life, you would be all set - forever.\xa0You would finally know how to manage all the things and feel confident in all the things.\xa0I kept desperately hoping I could find the level of mastery my coaches had because then life would be full of ease.\nFor a number of years in a row, I chose ease as one of my \u201cwords of the year\u201d.\xa0I chose this word because when I looked around it seemed others had actually found this elusive ease.\xa0My coaches, random people I followed on Instagram, other school moms - all seemed to have it.\xa0I figured if they could find it so could I - DAMMIT.\nBut over time - one by one -\xa0I started to see cracks.\xa0People who seemed to \u201chave it all together\u201d offered glimpses into their real lives.\xa0There was definitely much less ease than I expected.\xa0Sometimes, there was no ease at all.\xa0Instead, there was uncertainty, struggle, raw pain, and sometimes straight-up trauma.\nWhen we only show the world our pretty, shiny parts, we are doing a disservice to all women.\xa0It is in showing up with transparency (as long as it is safe to do so), that we allow other women to do the same.\xa0\xa0\nWe have been socialized to give 110%, to actively desire and desperately pursue perfectionism, to quietly keep our struggles behind closed doors.\xa0This greatly harms women while upholding and benefitting the Patriarchy.\xa0\nBy only showing the shiny parts of our lives and withholding the more authentic pieces of ourselves, we harm other women by:\xa0\n\nCreating unreal and unreasonable expectations for other women\n\nUpholding the social construct of perfectionism (that only exists for women)\n\nPerpetuating loneliness and isolation for women (and moms especially)\n\nUndermining authentic connection and the collective growth of women on a societal level\n\nEroding the collective mental health of women & moms\n\nImpairing and inhibiting your relationships\xa0\n\n\nIn this episode, I talk through how we have been socialized to hide certain parts of ourselves, why this works out great for men, and how you can start to practice transparency in safe ways in order to show up more authentically and create space for other women to do the same.\nWe love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://shamelessmom.com/sponsor\nInterested in becoming a sponsor of the Shameless Mom Academy? Email our sales team at sales@adalystmedia.com \nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices