Lower Reptillian Brain
My lower reptilian brain just went on maximum overload red alert, sitting here in my big, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room. Actually my fanny is sitting here in the chair, it was my brain that just exploded. That happens fairly frequently when I watch the day's news on TV. \n\tIt's the kicker stories at the end of the newscasts that get to me. Riots, threats of nuclear war, and another politician caught where his hand shouldn't be...maybe in a financial cookie jar, or on a lady's personal anatomy...I can deal with those things. But it's the stories at the end of the newscasts that sometimes light the fuse on my lower reptilian brain. As you probably know, they're called kickers. \n\tHere's one from today: "A new medical report says many men are having allergic reactions to a certain brand of latex condom. The allergic reaction causes severe swelling" My lower reptilian brain keeps yelling..."So what's the problem"...a condom causes swelling. At my age that could be a benefit. \n\tHere's another. "Young men are 4 times more likely than young women to get kidney stones." Right. More injustice. Young men get kidney stones, young women get diamonds. See what I mean? Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are a man's best friend. "27% of Facebook users say they have checked their facebook page while using the bathroom." My lower reptilian brain keeps telling me if that percentage ever exceeds 50% we should perhaps no longer call it FACEbook. \n\tEverybody has a lower reptilian brain. Including you. Scientists say your lower reptilian brain is part of your limbic system. I like to think of mine as kind of a friendly little wee beastie. I call my wee beastie Rumplestilskin Pfarfenugen. Pfarf for short. Pfarf causes problems for me sometimes.