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What feels worse than unrequited love? Being slighted by your beloved. At least the persona of the poems seems to think so in this cycle of sonnets. Still, he finds a way to forgive his beloved and to justify their actions.

One reason I have chosen to read these sonnets, is because they require careful study to figure out what they mean. That is exactly what we need to learn to do with all of the toxic and dishonest communication that fills our days. We jump to conclusions way too fast and are already fully engaged in a fight oftentimes before we even understand what the original document said.

It's similar to the idea Stephen Covey presents in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: seek first to understand and then to be understood. When we stop doing the work of listening we can end up in some pretty painful spots. 

You can't just read or hear a sonnet and know right away what you think about it. It requires some delay for comprehension and in that pause there is a chance for truer understanding to occur.

If we put an emphasis on comprehension and understanding it will elevate our conversations from the yelling matches that all too often take place. 

Reading difficult writing is good for us. It forces us to either admit that we do not immediately understand or else we choose to willfully proceed in ignorance. Only by taking time and asking questions do we come to a place where we have more confidence based in experience about the topic. 

We don't all need to chime in on every thing that the news serves us. If we do, however, it seems that reading critically and slowing down will surely improve the general tone of our public discourse. 

Arguments achieve merit based on their ability to make a persuasive case. They don't have to be true to be effective in a world where people are not thinking critically. When the loudest voice wins, we have no choice but to stage a shouting match. If we want to live in a more civil society, then developing our ability to communicate makes sense.

One glaring example of this shows up in the Johnny Depp vs Amber Heard case that is happening. It really is the perfect example of how our society can be bamboozled by spectacle into taking sides. With the court case, however, there is a methodical slowing down of the conversation. It is a fight. 

There is a major disagreement between the parties. In order to parse out the meaning of their recorded exchanges, it requires a whole team of people presenting parts of their exchanges and then interpreting them. This is happening to counter the article that was splashed across media accusing Depp of being abusive. 

By forcing Heard to testify, she has to listen to herself during their fights and try to explain what she was thinking. While she had presented certain click bait items of their arguments to sway the public opinion, her arguments do not hold up under scrutiny. What we learn from listening, is that she is extremely needy and manipulative. Depp doesn't come across as innocent or angelic by any means, but he consistently attempts to diffuse the fights and she keeps throwing gas on the fire.

This court case has been watched by so many people and there is a reason. We are fascinated with the battle between truth and beauty, between the facts of what happened and how we feel about the people involved. There is an inherent tension between our desire to take sides and the dark mystery of their relations.

Truth may not ever be fully accessible, but in an era when people seem to have given up on responsible communication it is refreshing to see that it is possible to get a lot closer to the truth once you take the time to listen and weed out the obvious lies.