19 Nocturne Boulevard - THE SEVENTH KEY - Reissue
THE SEVENTH KEY
A writer makes a bet that she can change her style - and perhaps her life - overnight
Written and produced by Julie Hoverson
Cast List
- Cindy Applegate - Chandra Wade
- Troy - Matthias Rebne Morgan
- Mandy - Crystal Thomson
- Regia - Kristina Yuen
- Tex - Mike Campbell
- Lucas - Abner Senires
- Roarke - Rick Lewis
- Old Scupper - Julie Hoverson
- Trooper 1 - Glen Hallstrom
- Trooper 2 - Franknvox
19 Nocturne theme music:\xa0 Kevin MacLeod (Incompetech.com)
All other music is from the album "Pursuit of Happiness" by C. Filipe Alves (used under a Creative Commons License, found at www.jamendo.com)
Recorded with the assistance of Ryan Hirst of Neohoodoo Studio
Editing and Sound: \xa0 Julie Hoverson\xa0
\xa0
"What kind of a place is it?
Why it's a writer's studio, can't you tell?"
\xa0
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The seventh key
The seventh Key is the other play vaguely inspired by the Seven Keys to Bald Pate - The book by Earl Derr Biggars, and the play by George M. Cohan, and the 1970s loosely inspired film The House of Long Shadows.
While Murder Ward arose primarily from the catfishing aspect of the story, this one is more obviously the basic plotline - author makes a bet to write something different if given an inspirational place, and then things go awry.\xa0 There's a hint that the catfishing is still happening, but maybe it's not.
Part of this is simply an indictment of the unrealistic expectations that romance novels give women - we all complain about porn creating unreal expectations for men, then dream about 7 foot tall warrior hunks with long fabio hair and tribal tatoos, and more junk than any man should have, since he would pass out every time from blood loss to the brain.
That's why every man in this play is utterly impossible, from Cindy's point of view.\xa0 They all prove that reality is terrible.\xa0 Originally Tex and Luke were both sort of dudebros, but a last minute replacement put Michael Campbell in for his first session with us, and he sounded too similar to Luke, and wasn't comfortable with a cowboy type accent (my original intention for Tex).\xa0 So on the spot we decided Tex was effusively gay - which would be another and different way he could be "completely unavailable" to our lovelorn writer.
The multiple endings are also inspired by Seven Keys to Bald Pate, and are more meant to show the many horrible ways a writers mind expects projects to go down in flames, or fall apart, than necessarily to show an actual event.\xa0 We all imagine having our book done, then finding it's gone horribly wrong....
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THE SEVENTH KEY
Cast:
- Olivia - Host
- Cindy Applegate (F30s), a writer
- Regia (F40s), Cindy's publisher
- Troy (M30s), Cindy's imaginary boyfriend
- Mandy (F30s), Cindy's sister
- Tex, Luke, Roarke (M20s/30s, obnoxious) - film crew
- Old Scupper (M, elder)- crusty old salt
- Trooper1 and 2 - (M, any) police
OLIVIA\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Did you have any trouble finding it?\xa0 What do you mean, what kind of a place is it?\xa0 Why, it's a writer's condo, can't you tell?\xa0
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 1.\xa0\xa0\xa0 WRITING AT HOME
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 COMPUTER, TYPING
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [muttering as she types, overwrought] ...and\xa0 I love you too, my dearest darling.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PHONE RINGS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [irritated mumble] Go away, he's about to make an indecent proposal.\xa0
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I can no longer contain my passion.\xa0 My blood hums for you.\xa0 You must be mine!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [ecstatic sigh]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PICKS UP PHONE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [almost an ecstatic sigh] Yes?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 You've been writing, haven't you?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [still dreamy] Of course.\xa0 That's what you want me to do, isn't it?
REGIA \xa0\xa0\xa0Of course.\xa0 So.\xa0 What's the new one?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 "Rogue of Fate"
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Quick pr\xe9cis?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Warwick Wellington, handsome and devilish owner of Wellington shipping lines and dabbler in exotic animals hires cat breeder Gloriana Mundy to help him birth a rare white leopard--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 They hate each other on sight, and yet fall in love, have a steamy sex scene and then argue, never to see each other again, but then the panther--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 --Leopard--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 --goes into labour and they have to work together to save the cubs, and realize their attraction is unavoidable?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [shocked] How-- how did you guess?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Cindy, you know I'm your friend as well as your agent, right?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, but what has--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's roughly the same as every plot you've ever written.\xa0 In fact I think it's identical to "Never the Twain Shall Sleep" except that was a prize-winning race horse instead of a leopard.\xa0 You're kind of predictable.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [truly distressed] But - no.\xa0 It can't be, I don't--\xa0 not on purpose!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 I know.\xa0 That's actually the very sad part.\xa0 I know, and you know, that you just happen to write that way, and not that you have a formula tacked to the wall that says "page 32, they meet.\xa0 At page 230, they quarrel" or anything like that.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I don't!\xa0 I swear!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 The good thing is that your books always sell.\xa0 I'm never going to fault you for that - but I'd love to see what you could do if you ever did break out of this rut.\xa0 You're a competent writer, and you'll always have an audience, but you could do more, if you tried something a little different.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Like what?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Are you seeing anyone?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Dr. Mallory said I didn't really need--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 I meant dating.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh.\xa0 [grudging] No.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 You should.
CINDY \xa0\xa0\xa0Men are pigs.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Which is why your heroes perspire rather than sweat.\xa0 Real women like real men.\xa0 At least a little bit.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They're ... messy.\xa0 Uncooperative.
REGIA.\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yup.\xa0 Try it - you might like it.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PHONE HANGS UP
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 2.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You are the only one who understand me, Troy.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Of course, my proud beauty.\xa0 For you are complex and mysterious and most men can't be bothered to see past the ends of their--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [cutting him off] Yes, yes.\xa0 Troy, you will always love me, won't you?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 As long as there is breath in my body.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, Troy!
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, Cindy!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PHONE RINGS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, pooh!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PICKS UP PHONE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey sis.\xa0 I guess I caught you at a bad time?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [irritated] I was just... composing. What do you need?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I was just going to see if you wanted to come to dinner this weekend.\xa0 George and I haven't seen you in ages.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Who is it this time?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [overly innocent] Whatever can you mean?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Please - when you start talking like... like--
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 One of your heroines?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [pedantic] The way people talked in the 18th and 19th century--
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I give up!\xa0 I will give you the code words.\xa0 His name is Rob, and he's a banker.\xa0 He's nice.\xa0 Cute even - if you don't mind someone a tad... cuddly.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Stop trying to fix me up - why can't you believe I'm just fine?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Because you're alone, and if I know you, you're talking to your imaginary boyfriend again.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You said you'd never--
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Drop it!\xa0 Sorry!\xa0 Come to dinner anyway.\xa0 We'll tell Rob you have something contagious, and you can just sit and be bored with the three of us.\xa0 [beat]\xa0 Cody misses his auntie.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Cody can't feed himself yet.\xa0 I doubt he can tell us apart, the way he keeps trying to get into my shirt.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 For a romance writer, you are the least sentimental person I know.\xa0 No wonder all your characters are cardboard cutouts.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They are not!
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Sweetie.\xa0 They all use the same 10 lines at some point in their respective narrative - there's an entire website devoted to spotting them and mocking you.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What ten lines?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Lessee - "my proud beauty"
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [squeaky gasp]
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 "As long as there is breath in my body", "you may take my body but you will never have my heart" - that one from her, whoever "her" is at the moment.\xa0 Hmm.\xa0 I can forward you the URL if you like.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!\xa0 And I'm not going to come to dinner.\xa0 I'm busy.\xa0 Writing.\xa0 Something completely different.
MANDY \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0I'll believe that when I read it.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You bet you will.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You're on!\xa0\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'll bet you one year that you can't write a real novel - even a novella - in the same time that it takes you to rattle off one of your froufrou books.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 One year?\xa0 Of what?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [chuckles evilly]\xa0 One year that you come to dinner twice a month and be nice to whoever we invite--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Whomever.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 --against one year when I won't even ask you over.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You're - you're on!\xa0 I could use a year of not being nagged.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But you have to get the first draft done in a weekend - that's how long you told Women's Day it takes you to write one of your books.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [gasp] How can anyone be so horrid?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'm your sister - and yes, that one's on the list too.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 MANDY HANGS UP.\xa0 CINDY SLOWLY PUTS DOWN RECEIVER
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Am I really that ... predictable?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 A woman is a bundle of senses, with a dash of nonsense.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Argh!
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 3.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Why didn\u2019t you ever tell me?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on phone]\xa0 I did - you just never heard.\xa0 I didn't push it because you always sell so well - to women who like a certain kind of man, a certain kind of story, and a certain kind of resolution.\xa0 You always deliver.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'm - I'm boring!\xa0 This website even says so.\xa0 "Good god!\xa0 How could I have been so blind" - oh No!\xa0 I will never say that again!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's not that bad.\xa0 Ignore the critics.\xa0 Write what you love.\xa0 As long as it sells, why worry about it?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Is money all you think about?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 I am an agent.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But I want people to like my books, not laugh at them.\xa0 I want to write something good.\xa0 Something meaningful.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, man.\xa0 I said you should try something different, but, meaningful?\xa0 Why such a change?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Because just surviving isn\u2019t living at all.\xa0 [defiant] and yes, that's one of the ten.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ten?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Never mind.\xa0 Will you help me?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Help you - with what?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I need a place to write.\xa0 Inspiration.\xa0 Atmosphere.\xa0 Just for a weekend - enough to rough out a new story.\xa0 [definite] Something meaningful.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Meaningful books are a tougher sell.\xa0 I like your books the way they are.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I can always go back to churning out the same old... crap...later.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 During our year of peace.
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 4.\xa0\xa0\xa0 OUTSIDE THE LIGHTHOUSE
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 WALKING, OUTSIDE, WIND, ONE PAIR OF FEET IS VERY STOMPY
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yar.\xa0 The lighthouse heah was decommissioned night on fotty yeahs gone.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 BIRD NOISE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, seagulls!
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [completely dry] Cahnt see why - being right heah on the beach, and all.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 KEYS JINGLE - OLD CREAKY DOOR OPENS
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Cahs it ain't been empty the hul time - we gets renters from time to time who want to paint or try that meditation yahoo, but-- but no one eveh stays more'n a month.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 THEY GO INSIDE, CREAKY DOOR SLAMS SHUT WITH AN ECHO
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [eep!]
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's all on account o' the ghost.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, that's exactly why I came here.
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Har har har.\xa0 Y'ain't the fust, young lady, to think they cud stand up t' the ghost.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I heard it was a woman who committed suicide?\xa0 Jumped off the--
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ain't that romantic, now?\xa0 Nar.\xa0 She were killed.\xa0 And then he killed hisself.\xa0 No one atall is dead sure which one itis which haunts the place - or mayhaps it's both of 'em.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, can't they see?\xa0 If it's in a dress--?
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yer head is full o' crap.\xa0 It's them movies and the T-V makes it sound like ghosts look just like regular folks.\xa0 Bah.\xa0 [spookier and spookier] This haunt - or haunts, as the case may be - is just a dark shape which covers the winduhs, making day inta night, and then it lets out such a scream -\xa0 a scream to shake down the very heavens.\xa0 Them as hears the scream falls inter a deep sleep and when they finally wake up, they find they've done ... terrible things.\xa0 Best you come on back befoah dark and stay in town.\xa0 Tis not far - just an hour or so afoot.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No.\xa0 I'm fine.\xa0 Thanks.\xa0
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Suit yerself.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FEET STOMP OFF.\xa0 DOOR OPENS.\xa0 CLICK
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey!
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ayah?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What about the electricity?
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yer don' know how t'work a jenny?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Who's Jenny?
OLD SCUPPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [disgusted noise] Gar.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR SHUTS, FEET STOMP AWAY INSIDE
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 5.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TYPING AWAY ON A LAPTOP
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [mutters as she types]\xa0 --window high above the pounding surf.\xa0 The darkness closes in, the wind echoes through the huge column of stone, and the rocks call out to her.\xa0 "Join us."\xa0 No, scratch that, "we have the answer to all your pain"--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 KNOCK ON THE OUTER DOOR ECHOES LOUDLY
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [eep!]\xa0 Coming!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 A COUPLE MORE LAPTOP KEYS
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ENDLESS FEET DOWN STAIRS, THEY STOP.\xa0 THEN CONTINUE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Just a minute!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FEET DESCEND AND FINALLY FADE INTO--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Coming!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [out of breath]\xa0 Hello?\xa0 [half wolf whistle, half gasp]\xa0 Hell-o!
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 [very campy] Hello!\xa0 Is this the Sutter's Wharf lighthouse?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [puzzled and disappointed] Yes.\xa0 Um.\xa0 Is there something I can do for you?
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 I wanted to make sure before we start bringing in the equipment.\xa0 [turns away and gives a huge whistle]\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Equip... what?
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 We'll be staying in here, then?\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FOOTSTEPS INTO ECHOES
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 [echoey] Hmm.\xa0 Not bad.\xa0 We're with "In Specter" - you know, the ghost hunting show?\xa0 We're doing a spot on the lighthouse this weekend.\xa0 Didn't you get the memo?\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But... but I'm renting the lighthouse this weekend.
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 You aren't the owner?\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I-I'm a writer - I came here for some peace and quiet and--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SQUEAKY WHEELS APPROACH
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 ["dude" yelling from off] Dude, get out of the way!\xa0 Got the beers!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [nearly in tears] -- and atmosphere.
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Sorry.\xa0 We've had it booked for six months.\xa0 You'll have to talk to Roarke.\xa0 Our boss.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Roarke?\xa0 That's a nice name.\xa0 I gotta make a note--
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 You got one?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 A note?
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 [snorting laugh] No.\xa0 A name.\xa0 I'm Tex, and this ...studmuffin is Luke.
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [a little off]\xa0\xa0Yo!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Cindy.\xa0 Cindy Applegate.
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh!\xa0 Woah!\xa0 Any relation to--?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [surprised and pleased] Yes - yes, it's me - I'm the writer.
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Writer?\xa0 No - you know, the hot actress.\xa0 Babelicious!\xa0 Smoking!\xa0 Awoo!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Argh!
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 6.\xa0\xa0\xa0 OUTSIDE
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PACING ON DIRT
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 This Roarke will just have to understand.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You will sway him with your plight.\xa0 And your beauty.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Maybe he'll even be handsome--
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Your eyes devoured those two musclebound--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But this Roarke guy is the boss.\xa0 He's probably Irish or something.\xa0 Fiery.\xa0 Passionate.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Who wouldn't be, faced with your loveliness?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Regia said she arranged everything.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Unless...
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Perhaps she thought the presence of other people might stir your creative juices.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Maybe...
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CAR WINDOW ROLLS DOWN
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Roarke?
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [obnoxiously Brooklyn] \xa0OK, I got 5 minutes.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [vastly disappointed] Oh.\xa0 Sure.\xa0 Um, my publicist--
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 I was just on the phone with her.\xa0 Someone well and truly screwed the pooch on this one, but we're willing to let you stick around while we work--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But I need quiet to write!
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Tough titty, babe.\xa0 You can stay, but only if you let the crew fit you into the show - Your agent said it would be good for your image, all that crap.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But when will I be able to write?
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 We'll be shooting local color tonight and tomorrow by day - write then.\xa0 But at night, you gotta be around in case this ghost shows up.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You think I'll really enhance the show?
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Chicks scream better.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 WINDOW ROLLS UP
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 7.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SEAGULLS, OUTSIDE AMBIANCE, OCEAN, WIND
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 KEYBOARD CLICKS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Muttering through gritted teeth]\xa0 Ensconced on the parapet, I gazed down over the jagged cliffs below, and wondered if perhaps this was the same view - the last view - of the murdered woman so long ago.\xa0 Whether the moaning of the wind in the rocks called to her, the way they sing now - even now - in my head.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 A COUPLE OF LAST CLICKS, LAPTOP CLOSES
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sigh]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's going well, all things considered.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes. \xa0But it's almost dark, and then--
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 He required you be available, not actually present.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I hope the ghost shows up - then they can get what they want and go.\xa0
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Have you considered--?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 That this was much too fortuitous - your arrival followed so closely by theirs?\xa0 Perhaps your agent did this a'purpose.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But why?\xa0 She wants me to write--
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ah, but she also wants you to socialize.\xa0 With real people.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, if I don't get this darn draft done, I'll definitely be stuck socializing - if you can call any of Mandy and George's friends "real".\xa0 [shudder]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Would it be so horrible?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 KNOCK ON DOOR
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, you up here?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 There you are, pretty lady.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What do you want?
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Making sure you didn't fall off or nothing.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [chilling] Nope.\xa0 Not yet.
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well.\xa0 Dinner's on, anyway.\xa0
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 8.\xa0\xa0\xa0 SHOOTING
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 WHIRRING OF MACHINERY
VOICE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on P.A.] IN SPECTOR
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 OK, so we're here in Sutter's Wharf lighthouse, waiting to see if the infamous screaming shadow will appear.\xa0
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 And for once, we're not all alone.\xa0 We have a guest - famous romance writer Cindy Appleton.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [hollow, deer in headlights]\xa0 Applegate.
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Applegate.\xa0 [beat]\xa0 Here, honey, wave.\xa0 I guess little Cindy ain't exactly hard to scare, huh, Luke?
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [chuckles]\xa0 Well, Tex, writing's a pretty lonely business.\xa0 And this is a lonely place.\xa0 Right Cindy?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes.\xa0
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah.\xa0 See, dude?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It is a lonely business.
TEX\xa0\xa0\xa0 Right.\xa0 Well, they say the ghost has been known to walk the platform around the light, upstairs.\xa0 So we're going to haul ass up there for a while.\xa0 Come on.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LIGHTS SWITCHED OFF
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 That coulda been better.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I thought ...there would be a script.
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 You wanna write one, go ahead, but we don't got the budget to pay for nuttin like that.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'm... sorry.
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No skin off my ass.\xa0 Embarrassing famous people goes over great on TV.\xa0 And your agent agreed that, short of actual nudity, anything we shoot of you this weekend will get her ok for air time.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 We should get clear of this nest of vipers!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [trying to be brave]\xa0 Well.\xa0 You can film me writing for the next half hour.\xa0 I have a scene that has to get written.
ROARKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Not bad - use the publicity from the show to push the book.\xa0 And vicey-versy.\xa0 Not bad at all.
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 9.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR SLAMS, SQUEAK, LATCH
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, I can get a little privacy anyway.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 OPEN LAPTOP, POWER UP
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You know I will always support anything you do--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 HORRIBLE DRILLING NOISE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What the blazes?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LATCH OPENS, DOOR OPENS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What's the--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 HORRIBLE DRILLING NOISE, LOUDER
CINDY\xa0 \xa0\xa0Ahhhhhhh!\xa0 [as soon as it ends] What IS that!
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Eyebolts, little dudette.\xa0 Can't have the cameras falling if the ghost shows up.\xa0 We got permission.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But the noise!
LUKE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah, sucks, don't it.\xa0 Oh, well.\xa0 Be done soon.\xa0 [laughs] Woah!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRILLING
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR SLAMS
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 10.\xa0\xa0\xa0 TIME PASSES
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TYPING
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [voice cutting the music]\xa0 Weren't they coming back to get you?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hmm?\xa0 Maybe they forgot about me.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But it's been hours.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Has it?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TURNING DOWN VOLUME OF THE MUSIC
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It is awfully quiet.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's past one.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Wow.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TAPPING A FEW LAST KEYS, CLOSE LAPTOP, REMOVE MEMORY STICK
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I guess I should see.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LATCH LIFTS, THEN HESITATES
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They might just be waiting to catch me off guard again.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't let them.\xa0 You're much too clever.\xa0 You can do this.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [quiet, echoing] Hello?
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 11.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 WALKING AND TURNING ON A CELLPHONE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Searching, searching...
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Perhaps they're filming outside?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They wouldn't have left all the equipment.\xa0 It's all just sitting there...\xa0 Even that darn drill.\xa0\xa0 [gasp]\xa0 Drat.\xa0 No bars.\xa0 Figures.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CELL PHONE SLAPS SHUT
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Leaving is a very viable option.\xa0 Grab your smallest case and we can--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But their blasted truck has boxed me in.\xa0
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Only about an hour's walk.\xa0 According to the ...rustic.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But if something happened here, wouldn't it have happened to me too?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Then... what?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I think it's a joke.\xa0 They thought it was funny catching me out in front of the camera, and now...
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 An even more persuasive argument that you must leave this place.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No.\xa0 I can just see it - bedraggled author crawls into town after night in haunted lighthouse, only to find camera crew at local bar.\xa0 Yes!\xa0 That's where they must be.\xa0 Well, I'm not playing.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 So you will--?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Go upstairs and get back to work.\xa0 There's still plenty of time before they stagger in.
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 12.\xa0\xa0\xa0 POWER TROUBLE
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR SHUTS, DOOR LATCH
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ELECTRIC NOISE, BUZZ-DIP.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, shi--oot!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LAPTOP UNPLUGGED, THEN TURNED ON
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, no!\xa0 Good thing I have backup.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LAPTOP BOOTS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sigh of relief]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ELECTRIC DIP, THEN OUT.\xa0 POP OF LIGHT BULB
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [eep!]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Now it's truly time to go.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But how will I get back down and out of here in the dark?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 How can you stay?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Easy.\xa0 I write for the four hours I have on battery, and by then dawn will be coming up.\xa0 I just sit tight.
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 13.\xa0\xa0\xa0 WORKING
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TYPING MADLY
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What if it was the ghost?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, whose imaginary friend are you anyway?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [calming] I help you to express your fears.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, right now, any fears I have are right outside that door, and can stay there.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ELECTRIC NOISE RETURNS
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRILL OUTSIDE THE DOOR - continues until noted
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Starts screaming]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Shh,\xa0 It's going to be all right. Shh.\xa0 Calm down.\xa0 You need to be calm.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [down to whimpering]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's not that bad - the power just came back on and the surge started the drill.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [gasping] Really?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [uncertain]\xa0 It's the only logical answer.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Logic sucks.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The noise won't go away until you go out there and turn it off.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What if you're the only one here - that damn noise will drive you mad until you put it right.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Someone had to turn on the generator.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Really?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I think so.\xa0 So someone has to be out there.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [ominous] Someone.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You're doing it again!\xa0 Shh!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FOOTSTEPS COMING UP THE STAIRS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [eep]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Who do you think it is?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ssh.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No one but you can hear me, my sweet one.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [whispered] Oh.\xa0 Right.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FOOTSTEPS GET CLOSE.\xa0 DOOR IS RATTLED
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [gasping]
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 If they were not villains, they'd hail you, wouldn't they?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Uh-huh.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Bloody hell.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Uh-huh!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FOOTSTEPS GO ON PAST
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh good.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRILL IS TURNED OFF
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [huge sigh]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SOMETHING HEAVY DROPS.\xa0 FOOTSTEPS START TO RETURN
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [rapid breathing, trying to stay quiet]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SUDDEN POUNDING ON DOOR
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [hands over mouth, to keep self quiet]
TROOPER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [muffled] Police!\xa0 Open up!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Police?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Can you trust him?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [whispered] What else can I do?\xa0 [up, but shaky] I'm coming.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SLOW STEPS TO DOOR, LATCH OPENS, THEN DOOR
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Police?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Will you step out here ma'am?\xa0 Please keep your hands where I can see them.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?\xa0 Why?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 [calling off]\xa0 Found one!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 One what?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Survivor.\xa0 Come on.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I can't leave my laptop!\xa0 What do you mean, survivor?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 We're just going downstairs - for the moment.\xa0 Everything will be perfectly safe.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FEET SLOWLY DESCEND STAIRS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Heavens!
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Stay to the right here, at the bottom of the stairs - we don't want you walking in the evidence.\xa0 Come on.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I can't!
TROOPER2\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey!\xa0 What's the hold up?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What happened?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 That's what we want you to tell us, ma'am.\xa0 Now if you would just step this way--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FEET RUN UPSTAIRS, HEAVY BOOTS FOLLOW.\xa0 SHE IS GRABBED
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 [struggling with her] We've tried to be polite about this, but you have to come with us - it's not a request.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [breathing hard, half whispered]\xa0 I've never seen so much blood!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 FOOTSTEPS DESCEND AGAIN
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'm willing to believe that, miss, but we need to find out what you did see.\xa0 I mean tonight.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nothing.\xa0 Before the lights went out, no one was here, and then there was no power, so I worked on battery in my room, and then you turned...them back on...
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 You didn't hear anything?\xa0 Anything at all?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I tend to be ... lost... in thought - when I write.\xa0 And the walls seem pretty thick.\xa0 [breath catches]\xa0 What... happened?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't know.\xa0 The bodies are all ... missing.\xa0
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 14.\xa0\xa0\xa0 ONE PHONE CALL
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I promise you, I didn't see or hear anything.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on phone] Did you tell them that?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Over and over again.\xa0 They won't believe me.\xa0 They think I did some awful thing!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 I know a few lawyers.\xa0 We'll get this sorted out.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But I didn\u2019t do anything!\xa0
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Sorry, you caught me in a bad cell zone.\xa0 Let me get to a land line and call you back.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CLICK PHONE OFF
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 That's a fine kettle of fish.
TROY\xa0\xa0 \xa0They would never convict you - they must see what a lovely soul you truly are.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 People have been wrongly convicted in the past.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Perhaps she will find you a handsome and masculine attorney who, convinced of your innocence, will set you free in the eleventh hour.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0 I want to be set free in the first hour!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [eep!]
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 All right, you're free to go.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I ...am?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Found them.\xa0 They're fine.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But the blood?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Minor accident with a drill.\xa0 All cleared up now.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 So I can - go?\xa0 Go back to my writing?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 [up close and personal] From the state of you, you need a long hot soak in a scented tub, with candles, and maybe a hot oil massage.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [breathless, hopeful]\xa0 Really?\xa0
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 [flippant] That\u2019s what your agent suggested, anyway.\xa0 We can get you to a nice hotel where you can--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No.\xa0 I'm going to stay right here and finish my new book, and you can't stop me.\xa0 [losing her edge]\xa0 You can't stop me, can you?
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Do what you want.\xa0 You'll be all alone - at least for the night.\xa0 The crew should be back by mid-morning, though.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 All the more reason to use my time wisely.\xa0 Bye, now!
TROOPER1\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, and watch out for the ghost!
CINDY\xa0 \xa0\xa0[gasp!]
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 15.\xa0\xa0\xa0 THE HAUNTING
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What time is it?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nearly 4 am.\xa0 Long past the witching hour, now is truly the dead of night.\xa0 The darkest hour just before dawn.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Dawn is at 6:43 a-m today.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ah!\xa0 Then the darkest hour is yet to come.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, I'm a good 150 pages in, anyway.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SCREECH
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What--?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 A night bird, perhaps?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SCREECH, LOUDER
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No, it's--
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The ghost!
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hide yourself!\xa0 Cover your ears!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!\xa0 The only way to conquer this sort of phantasm--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SCREECH
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [losing steam rapidly] Is to... face it down?
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You are so brave.\xa0 And so beautiful.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Thank you.\xa0 I needed that.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Of course.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR FLUNG OPEN
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SCREECH
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Screams - much like she is falling, much like the squeak]
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 16.\xa0\xa0\xa0 FALSE ENDING ONE
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [waking up noises, eep]
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 See.\xa0 Told you she'd be fine.\xa0 Cindy-- [trying not to laugh] The look on your face!\xa0 It was priceless.\xa0 Here, I caught it - see?\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 PHONE BEING OPENED, PICTURES SCROLLED THROUGH
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What are you doing here?\xa0 What happened?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I just won a bet, is what happened.\xa0 Now you've got to make nice to every one of George's friends.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What do you mean?\xa0 I still have time--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 You've been dead to the world for over 10 hours, which brings your window of opportunity to a nice tidy close.\xa0 Sorry about that, but you should learn to pace yourself.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But it's nearly completed - that MUST count for something!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 This file on your laptop?\xa0 The one that just repeats the same ten lines over and over.\xa0 Very Stephen King, but not really marketable, sweetheart.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I didn\u2019t!\xa0 Let me see!\xa0 Oh, god, what have I done?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, that's one of them.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You rigged it, didn\u2019t you?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?\xa0 Why would I do that?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The two of you - you were in it together, conspiring to make me ...\xa0 to force me to lose!
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Laughing]\xa0 Well, we did hire a couple of guys.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They were more than ready to help.\xa0
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But why?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 A single woman is an embarrassment.\xa0 It's just a fact.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 This is all just to convince me to find a man?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Pretty much.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Troy?\xa0 Where are you--?
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Troy's not real.\xa0 You must realize that.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Screams - much like she is falling]
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 17.\xa0\xa0\xa0 FALSE ENDING 2
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TAPPING AWAY ON KEYS
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [mutters]\xa0 And she spent the rest of her days locked up in a padded cell, demanding that someone find Troy and get him to come and visit her.\xa0 The end.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Most excellent.\xa0 You will surely win your bet.
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [melodrama] Somehow, the bet is unimportant, now.\xa0 I've really grown through writing this.\xa0 I can see that my life will be different - better - if I let myself deal with people on a one to one basis.\xa0 If I forge a meaningful relationship with a good man.
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Then you will no longer need me?
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I will always need you, Troy!
TROY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, Cindy!
CINDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Screams in ecstacy - still sound much like she is falling]
MUSIC
\xa0
SCENE 18.\xa0\xa0\xa0 THE ENDING
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 And that's how it ends.\xa0 It's really--
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Really?
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 A steaming heap of poo.
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [very disappointed]\xa0 Ohh.
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 It'll still sell millions.\xa0
MANDY\xa0\xa0\xa0 But she worked so hard--
REGIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah, yeah.\xa0 And it has the huge advantage of being the last thing she wrote.\xa0 Lucky we were able to recover anything from the laptop at all - since she took it with her when she made that leap off the lighthouse.
CLOSING
OLIVIA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Now that you know how to find us, don't be a stranger - we have enough of those already...\xa0
\xa0
\xa0