19 Nocturne Boulevard reissue of the week: IDIOT BOX
Sometimes "reality" TV takes it one step too far.\xa0 Sometimes two steps.\xa0 Sometimes a flying leap.
WARNING:\xa0 IMPLIED VIOLENCE AND TORTURE
Written and Produced by Julie Hoverson
Cast List
Announcer\xa0 - Frankenvox
Alison - Beverly Poole
Bart - Michael Faigenblum
Carl - Mike Campbell
Debbie - E. Vickery
Ms. Sheldon - Sharon Delong
Tanya - Tanja Milojevic
Mom - Shayla Conrad-Simms
Dad - Reynaud LeBoeuf
Son - Eli Nilsson
Fred - Joel Harvey
Bob - Glen Hallstrom
Helen - Helen Edwards
June - Shelbi McIntyre
Kathy - Kim Poole
Additional Voices - Russell Gold; Julie Hoverson
Music by Brian Bochicchio (Seraphic Panoply)
Show theme:\xa0 Kevin MacLeod (Incompetech.com)
Editing and Sound: \xa0 Julie Hoverson
Cover Design:\xa0 Brett Coulstock
\xa0
"What kind of a place is it?
Why it's right here, right now, can't you tell?"
************************************************************************
IDIOT BOX
Cast:
[Opening credits - Olivia]
TV Announcer
Alison, chipper
Bart, sullen
Carl, upbeat, hearty
Debbie, nervous, angry underneath
Ms. Sheldon, executive producer
Tanya, in the sound booth
Family - mom, dad, teenage son
Bar - Fred, Bob, Helen
Dorm - June, Kathy
OLIVIA \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0Did you have any trouble finding it?\xa0 What do you mean, what kind of a place is it?\xa0 Why, it's right here, right now, can't you tell?\xa0
MUSIC
SOUND \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0THEME MUSIC
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 last week, in the record-breaking debut of The Box, we were introduced to our four contestants:
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [chipper] I'm Alison, from Santa Monica.\xa0 Hi, mom!
CARL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [hearty] Carl, from Atlanta - home of the Cartoon Channel!!\xa0
DEBBIE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [nervous] Debbie, from Salem.\xa0 Uh, Oregon.\xa0 [quickly] Salem Oregon.
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sullen] Bart, Minneapolis [disgusted sigh].
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 The rules are on the screen now for all you viewers out there, to cover the formalities.\xa0 They are also available on our website at [spelled out superfast] w-w-w-dot-s-k-i-n-n-e-r-i-d-i-o-t-b-o-x-dot-com.\xa0
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 FAMILY LIVING ROOM
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CHIPS EATEN FROM BAG
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] And after this brief message, we'll show you the results of last week's voting.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CLICK OF REMOTE
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 POPCORN POPPING IN MICROWAVE
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [off] You better not have turned that off, hun!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 MICROWAVE DINGS
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Just muted.\xa0 Sick of all these ads for freaking erectile dysfunction.\xa0 If anything's going to give a guy man-trouble, it's having to watch all those damn ads.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 POURING POPCORN INTO BOWL
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ew, dad.\xa0 T-M-I.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [coming in, munching popcorn] The one I hate is that smiling guy.\xa0 His wife just looks so scared all the time.\xa0 Almost as creepy as the King.
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Am I adopted?\xa0 Please say yes.
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ooops, back on!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 Did everyone vote?
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 I certainly did!
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Mom?\xa0 [disgusted noise] Why?
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] The voting is closed, the tabulations have been made, and the scores are coming up on the screen now.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [over the announcer] Why not?\xa0 I want that nice young girl - the blonde - to win.\xa0 She's very wholesome.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] And it looks like today Alison has been selected!\xa0
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [satisfied] There!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 We have Alison in the studio now - let's see how she takes it.
SOUND \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0LIGHT MUSIC, ON THE TV SEGUES INTO REALITY
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hello Alison!\xa0 Say hi to everyone!\xa0
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hi!\xa0 Hi mom! \xa0Dad!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 How's the first week been treating you?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 This place is great!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Throughout the show, we'll be showing some of the fun you four have been having.\xa0 Now, why don't you tell me what you think of your new friends?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, wow - everyone's really great.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't you find Bart a bit... isolated?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 He's just self-contained.\xa0 I'm sure he's a good guy, he just doesn't open up real easily.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 And Debbie?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 She's shy - a lot like my sister.\xa0 Hi Vickie!!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [chuckles] That's great.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 And Carl - well, he's a blast.\xa0 He's always thinking up great stuff to do.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yesterday you had sole access to the Dairy Dan Amusement park.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, man - that was awesome! \xa0They closed the gates and we got to ride all the rides all day long - no lines, no crowds!\xa0 Woo!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 You've been chosen.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Woo!\xa0 [stumbles] I - What?\xa0 What?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CONTROL BOOTH
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 Please step into the box.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV - gasp, then steels herself]\xa0 Right.\xa0 [somewhat bitter] Thanks America.
- SHELDON That's the shot - tight in on 2, now 3 - yes! Keep her face centered until she shuts the door.
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Got it.
- SHELDON Okay, keep the volume low on that. It's early yet - don't want to wear out the viewers...
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] ELECTRIC SHOCK NOISE, SOMEWHAT BRIEF
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV - short scream]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] We'll be right back after the break to find out what today's challenge will be.
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 DORM ROOM
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Omigod!\xa0 Omigod!\xa0 Did you see that?
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [distracted] Hmm?\xa0 No but I sure heard it - did they just do what I think they did?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 They just shocked the crap out of the blonde chick!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Was there actually crap?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [duh] She was in the box.\xa0 Shh.\xa0 It's coming back on.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV TURNS UP
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] We'll be right back with more of The Box after these messages.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SOUND DOWN AGAIN
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 I hate when they do that.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Shock someone?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No, have the logo come up and make you think the show is back on.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah, that's much worse.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 You know what I mean!\xa0 It was totally mean that they shocked her - she's the one who got the most votes!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Isn't that what everyone was voting for?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!\xa0 At least, I don\u2019t think so - I mean, I thought it was voting for who would win something cool.\xa0 I ...voted for her.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 You actually voted?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 On the website, yeah.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Of course there's a website.\xa0 Maybe you should read the fine print.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, oh!\xa0 It's back on!\xa0 Jeez, look at her poor hair!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV UP
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] Back to the interview room, to hear from Alison.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [real] Before we go on, I need to point out, this is the only time you can choose to leave the show.\xa0 Are you prepared to stay?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [gulps, then quiet]\xa0 Yes.\xa0 [clears her throat, louder]\xa0 Yes.\xa0 [very shaky] That wasn't so bad.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Excellent.\xa0 Now I believe you recently graduated from college, Alison.\xa0 What did you get your degree in?
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 BAR
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 I'm a liberal arts major, with a minor in art history.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 So she's unemployed, eh?
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 And you are engaged to be married?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Too bad.\xa0 All the cute ones are taken.\xa0 Even with that weird hairdo.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV SWITCHED TO SPORTS
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, we were watching that!
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Why?\xa0 It's awful, letting them mess with people on TV like that!
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 [scornful] It's not real.\xa0
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Course it is - it even has a website!
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Puh-leez.\xa0 Lots of things have websites that aren\u2019t real.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Name one.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Pamela Anderson's boobs.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 She got you there, pal.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 C'mon - just switch it back long enough to see what today's challenge is?\xa0 Please?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ya big softie, you.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV CHANGES BACK
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] Carl, you got the second most votes this week - Do you have anything to say to the viewers at home?\xa0 Obviously you're doing something right, to get so many votes.
CARL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 I think it's just my sunny personality, Bob.\xa0 People like winners, and I am a winner.
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 LIVING ROOM
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Weiner.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Language!
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [dismissive noise] Doesn't that dipstick know that most votes gets zapped?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Maybe he doesn't - they might not tell THEM everything, either.\xa0 Makes sense.\xa0 Why else would they be so excited?
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 But that sucks!\xa0 That sucks big time!\xa0 Here they are, trying to be all cool and get people to vote for them, and they're like masterminding their own torture or something.
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's just a game,\xa0 No one really gets hurt.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, I was kind of upset that Alicia--
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Alison.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, that she got shocked.\xa0 I didn\u2019t know that voting for her would do that.\xa0 I kind of feel bad now.
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, don't vote for her next time.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 I certainly won't!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on TV] Well, we've spoken to two of our four contestants, and the voting is open for the halftime winner.\xa0 Go on line now or text to--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV MUTES, AMB/DORM
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 COMPUTER KEYS
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 What are you doing?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Voting.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Vicious much?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No! I - I just don\u2019t want her to have to get shocked again.\xa0 Damn!\xa0 It only lets me choose one of those two - not the other guy.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 So you want to see him get shocked?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, no, but I like him the least.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Just cause you don't think he's cute.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ONE LAST KEY
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Um, there.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 So who'd you vote for?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 The guy - the nice one - of course.\xa0 I like him, too, but I don't want her to get shocked again.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV UP AGAIN
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] Regular text messaging fees apply.\xa0 And now\u2011\u2011
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 OMINOUS MUSIC ROLLS IN
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV, ominous] The moment in the spotlight.\xa0 Will it be Alison or Carl?\xa0 The voting closes in three minutes, so hurry up and make your vote count - if the lines are overloaded, make sure and try back - but be quick.\xa0\xa0 [normal] While we wait, let's watch some clips from the preliminary interviews with the other two contestants.
MUSIC
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] And what are you studying?
DEBBIE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] I'm - um - a poli sci major.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 So she's gonna end up unemployed too.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Whatever happened to good old trade schools?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 They're still around - just the trades aren't.\xa0 You seen any cobblers in the U.S. of A recently?\xa0 Nope.\xa0 It's all farmed out to Pakistan and Koala Lumper.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Lumpur.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Sez you.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 I can turn it off, you know.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah - see now Helen here's got a job that can't be farmed out - long as there's guys like us, there's always gonna be bars, eh?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Until they invent a mixology robot.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, the lights are flashing on the screen, must be something important.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV TURNED UP.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 OMINOUS MUSIC INTENSIFIES
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV; evil "suspense" pacing]\xa0 And the one who got the most halftime votes.\xa0 Will it be Alison, our stoic liberal arts major?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, yes - come on come on!!!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] Or Carl, who tutors children with learning disabilities.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, that's awful!
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Awful? That he works with retarded kids?
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [almost a whisper] That I voted for him.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] And the one who got the most votes in the 8-minute half-time poll was--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 HEAVY DRUMBEAT
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] Was--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 HEAVY DRUMBEAT
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Look at how much she's sweating!
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 You'd sweat too if you just got shocked!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] is -Carl!
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Whew!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Shh.\xa0 Let's see what happens.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] This means that at the end of tonight's show, Carl will be up against the second half winner in a showdown to see who gets a million dollars sent to the charity of their choice.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Waitaminute - she gets shocked and he gets a chance to win big bucks?\xa0 That's so not fair!
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 That's the way it is.\xa0 Women always getting the short stick.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Especially when they\u2019re dating you, eh?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 [laughs, tried to stop]
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah, yeah - you can joke now, but I'll give you 70-30 odds that the other winner is that other guy.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 The grouch?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yup.\xa0 Is it a bet?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Fifty bucks?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Whoah, whoah! \xa0Let's not get carried away here, now.
MUSIC - OPENING THEME, PLAYS FOR A MOMENT
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Entering week five of The Box, you can see the ratings posted for our four contenders.\xa0 [hushed] Last week, it looked as though Debbie had finally broken--
DEBBIE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] I hate it!\xa0 I hate you all! You can all just go and--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 LONG SERIES OF BLEEPED WORDS
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 ZAPPING AND SCREAMING UNDER NEXT LINE
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 But after her trip to the box, she refused to cry off.
DEBBIE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] [breathing heavily and gulping] No [gasp] way! [gasp]\xa0 You don't [gasp] get rid of me [long shaky breath] that easily. [sob]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 And now, a new week - and what was this week's challenge?
STUDIO AUDIENCE Fasting!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes, fasting.\xa0 Whoever could go the longest without eating even a single bite of food got a free pass this week\u2011\u2011
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] --and we'll find out who managed that in just a moment - after a few words from our sponsors.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CLICK, SOUND OFF
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [urging] C'mon Debbie!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Debbie?\xa0 Hah.\xa0 She's got no body fat to start with.\xa0 Bart has a much better chance of surviving--
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't say that!\xa0 You just like him cause you know I don't!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I root for the underdog.\xa0 It's a principal. And no one likes that poor bastard.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 If no one likes him, how come Debbie's the one always getting shocked, huh?\xa0 [almost a sob] Huh?
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 Let's bring our four contestants out on stage to hear who's going to be free and clear for another week.\xa0 Alison--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 MUSIC UP, DOOR OPENS, SHAKY FOOTSTEPS
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [real] Alison, how are you feeling?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [trying to be perky] Not too bad.\xa0 I made it almost three whole days on nothing but water.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 But then you lost it?
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [heavy sigh] Yeah, I had to give in and get something.\xa0 [resigned] I figured fine - just put me in the box.\xa0 At least that eventually ends.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Thank you, Alison.\xa0 Now go over to the isolation booth while we talk with each of your friends.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [venomous] Friends?\xa0 Hah!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV, confidential] She needs to learn to be careful about trading today's pain for tomorrow's - what she doesn't know is we've [ramping up] turned the voltage up another notch!
AUDIENCE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV, CHEERS]
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 This just keeps getting worse.\xa0 It has to be against the law.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, come on.\xa0 They signed waivers, didn't they?\xa0 Plus, it's all fake - like wrestling.\xa0 Seriously.\xa0 Even if they did do this stuff, they have to have doctors and all on staff - make sure no one really gets hurt.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 UNWRAPPING AND OPENING A FORTUNE COOKIE
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, listen to this - "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Figures the Chinese would think of that first.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nah.\xa0 The Chinese didn't make that up.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Then who did say it?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 [immediate] Thomas Jefferson.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 I don't think so.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah?\xa0 And who do you think it was?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Some Greek philosopher or other.\xa0 [idea] Julius Caesar!
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 You guys make your bet, I'll call Jonesy on the next commercial and he can google it.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV TURNS UP
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 So Bart, you made it the longest without eating - you have any special tips for the viewers out there on how you did it?
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 [real] Huh?
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Any tips?\xa0 We'll give you a minute - these moments of uncertainty are just further proof that our show is live and unedited.\xa0 While Bart ponders this, I'll recap - Alison gave into her craven need for food first, followed by Carl and Debbie - in a virtual photo finish, where Debbie held out for one millisecond longer than Carl.\xa0 Good going Debbie!
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 I hate you.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hmm?\xa0 What's that?
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 I hate you and all you stand for.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Do I hear an opt-out coming?\xa0 For those of you just tuning in, during this episode and this episode alone, any of our four contestants can opt out at any time - not just immediately following a trip into the Box.\xa0 So Bart, are you--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 A BEEP TRIES TO CUT HIM OFF ON THE FIRST WORD
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 Fuck you!\xa0 You can't get rid of me that easily.\xa0
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] I don't care how many times you drug me and try to get me to bow down to the corporate machine!\xa0 You and all you people at home - you are sadistic bastards, but I'm here for the long haul - And when I finish, whether I win or not, I will be traveling around the country demanding the pound of flesh each and every one of you bastards owe me!!!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 For god's sake, turn it off.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No, he's making a valid point.\xa0 We shouldn't be party to this.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The very act of watching it validates it.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No.\xa0 I'm only doing this to bear witness.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The advertisers don't care.\xa0 They just want to you to watch.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, I won't vote any more.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Then you can't complain when your favorite gets zapped.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [upset] Oh hell!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 Well, that was very enlightening.\xa0 Before you out there start emailing and phoning - please refer to clause 42 slash 8 slash F, subsection I-I-I, paragraph y, where it sets out the game's rules covering mental illness or defect.\xa0 Thank you, and good night!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV TURNED OFF
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Anyone checked out the big pools?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 What do you mean?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 There's huge bets all over the place - everyone guessing who's gonna last the longest.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, no one's washed out yet.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 They're a tough bunch of kids, but I bet I could make it on that show.\xa0 Age does bring wisdom.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 To who?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 You're too young to remember this, but I was a P-O-W in nam [rhymes with "ham"].\xa0 I been through it all.\xa0 Torture, deprivation, brain washing.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 They sure got yours squeaky clean.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRINKS WHOLE BEER DOWN.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ahhh.
MUSIC\xa0\xa0\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 This week, week 9 of The Box, we might just lose a second contestant.\xa0
ANNOUNCER \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[TV] Alison, you've spent three days in this jacuzzi - brought to us courtesy of Big Joe's cut-rate pools and spas.\xa0 Now, people might think this was fun, but of course, you can't fall asleep or you might drown!\xa0
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV, parched, delirious]\xa0 You suck, Bob.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Friend of yours?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 You wish.
ALISON \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[TV]\xa0 Get me out.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] You do know that whomever leaves their jacuzzi first goes directly into the box?
ALISON \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[TV] No!\xa0 I want out!\xa0 OUT!\xa0 I can't - you can't make me stay here!
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 They can't, can they?
KATHY \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0How much you wanna bet she signed something that says they can?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 That's illegal!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Being stupid and greedy?\xa0 Nah.\xa0 They'd run out of prisons.\xa0 Unless you subscribe to the idea that our whole world is a prison.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [very upset] Don't talk like that - look at that poor girl!\xa0 They're just dragging her across the stage!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Wow.\xa0 I wouldn't'a thought it would take three guys to handle her, after all the crap she's been through.
ALISON\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV - screaming weakly and struggling]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] It is understood, under the rules, that the clemency episode has run out and, once again, the only time you can opt out is right after a session in the box--
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 If she's all wet, wouldn't that make the shock worse?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 At least her hair doesn't end up all weird since they shaved her head after that challenge last week--
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Three weeks ago.
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Really?\xa0 Anyway, they probably compensate somehow.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Are you sure?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 [unsure] Well... They can't really hurt her - that would be...
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0\xa0\xa0 \xa0Oh, and - I've just got a word from the producer!\xa0 We've got a three minute vote - so grab your phones!\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [real] Now this will cost one dollar per vote, so make yours count!\xa0 Dial the studio number and hit 1 if you want us to let Allison forfeit and leave now, push 2 if you think we should hold her to the rules.\xa0 And voting opens [beat, then TV] Now!
- SHELDON Start the positive counter.
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 On it.\xa0 Running.
NARRATOR \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[TV] The positive votes will tally right here on the corner of the screen, and if, after the vote closes, there are more positive than negative votes, Alison will\xa0 immediately leave the studio - damper but wiser...
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Man, I wish I was in Vegas.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nah - you know what's going to happen.\xa0 The odd's'll be crap.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Course.\xa0 They'll let her go.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 You gotta lotta faith in people, babe.\xa0 Nah.\xa0 I'll give you 10 to 1 she's gonna ride the lightning.
BOB \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[incredulous] "Ride the lightning?"
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 You know - old sparky. The electric chair?\xa0 Man where have you been?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Considering no one's been executed in an electric chair in this state for - um - help me out Helen--
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 50 years.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 50 years.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Really?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 How the hell'm I supposed to know?
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well, whatever - a long time.\xa0
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Actually, I think this state always hanged people.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hung.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 The countdown! 5 - 4 -
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 3-2-
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [almost breathless] One.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV]\xa0 All votes are in, and as you can see, we had a regular landslide of support for our dear friend Allison here.\xa0 we have 4 million six hundred seventy two thousand, three hundred and forty-two votes for clemency.\xa0 Good for you everyone!\xa0 We'll show the other side, right after this--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV OFF
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 No way!
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 You can't\xa0\xa0\xa0 !
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 I won't watch any more of this.\xa0 This is brutal.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [angry] Don't you dare!\xa0 How can we not ... find out?
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 No.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Just until they announce it - we don't have to watch ...if she...
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Gets it?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 REMOTE THROWN ONTO TABLE
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 You do what you want.\xa0 I'll be in the garage.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [after a moment] TV CLICKS ON
COMMERCIAL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [something]
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 I bet the commercials for this cost top dollar.\xa0 Like superbowl ads.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 How can you just be so snarky - that girl could die!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nah.\xa0 They can't do that.\xa0 It would be illegal.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Not normally, but remember when that guy had a stroke on "Danger Island" last year?\xa0 The family sued, but the waiver made it perfectly legit.\xa0
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 And that wasn't even that exciting.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on TV]\xa0 For those just tuning in, we have perky little Allison in the Box, awaiting your verdict.\xa0 [continues under] Does she take the next shock, or have you tipped toward clemency for this poor girl?
- SHELDON Give them the split picture.
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Before and after?
- SHELDON Uh-huh. [grim] Show them what they did.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on TV] The negative votes have been tallied.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRUM ROLL, OMINOUS MUSIC
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [ON TV] And we had 4 million six hundred seventy two thousand, three hundred and forty-two votes to let her go.\xa0
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'm still saying they'll let her off.\xa0
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Nope.\xa0 You already lost that twenty, pal.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Shh!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] The negative count is seven million three hundred--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV OFF
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Did you vote?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes.\xa0 [beat]\xa0 Twenty times.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [shrug] You can't beat the bastards.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 But if everyone just voted a few more times...
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Three million more times.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 How can people be so horrible?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [NEXT DOOR TV] SCREAMING
PEOPLE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [laughing]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 POUNDING ON WALL
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [yelling at them] How can you be so horrible??
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 They're drunk.\xa0 Didn't you see the sign?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [half a sob] Sign?
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 The one that said "come to gary's room, get drunk and watch The Box"?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [down] No.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Look, turn it on.\xa0 You'll see she's not dead or anything, then you'll feel better.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 But what if she's not?\xa0 I mean, what if she is?\xa0 I mean--
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sigh] Then you'll know.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [beat, then] TV TURNS ON
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on TV] AMBULANCE SIRENS
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sob]
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sob] Her poor parents!
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't worry so much - she's not dead.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 She was for 43 seconds.
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 That doesn't even count these days - happens all the time on House.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [very upset] But this is real!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 [on tv] MUSIC UP
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv]\xa0 And we'll be checking in with Allison as soon as she regains consciousness to confirm her wish to opt out.\xa0 For now, the game comes down to Bart and Carl.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't forget - no matter what happens, the game's big final episode is in two weeks.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CAMERA OFF
- SHELDON Nicely done.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's really wearing me thin.
- SHELDON Almost over. And after today's vote, there's no way the station can afford to cancel us.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sigh, then grudging] Two more shows.\xa0
- SHELDON [with meaning] And then we announce the results.
MUSIC - OPENING THEME, PLAYS FOR A MOMENT
AMB \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0NOISY BAR
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 [ordering] Another one.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Packed tonight.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRINK SET DOWN
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's the finale.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tired] Oh, yeah.\xa0 That.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Bottom's up!
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Slow down, or I'm gonna have to pour you into a cab.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CAR KEYS SLAPPED ONTO THE BAR, SCOOPED UP
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 GLASS SET DOWN HARD
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ahhh.
CROWD\xa0\xa0\xa0 ROAR OF EXCITEMENT
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hold on!\xa0 I'll get it.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV SOUND UP
MUSIC\xa0\xa0\xa0 FANFARE
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's the night we've all been waiting for.\xa0 The night the final results are announced.\xa0 And we will have an ultimate winner.\xa0 Let's recap what the winner will walk away with.\xa0
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 VOLUME DOWN
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Oh, you're not watching that, are you?\xa0 [sneer] I thought you decided it wasn't worth it!
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [shell shocked] I can't not watch!\xa0 I have to know!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Look, let's go to the library or something.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!\xa0 I would die of suspense!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's not--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV VOLUME COMES UP
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sigh] I'm not staying.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR CLOSES
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 And the contest comes down to our two finalists, Bart and Carl.\xa0 They have endured amazing hardship to make it this far.\xa0 Do you have anything you want to say to the people at home, Bart?
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 You still suck and you always will. \xa0Every single one of you!\xa0 Every person who just sits by and supports this shit!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [still jovial]\xa0 And yet, you have continued to play our sick little games - as you call them - despite being offered chance after chance to leave.
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hah!\xa0 I don't plan to fucking let you win, you scumbags!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Well said.\xa0 And you, Carl, do you have anything for the audience?
CARL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [mumbles]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Speak up?
CARL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [vague, reciting] We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.\xa0 Sitting by lone sea-- lone sea....\xa0 the sea.\xa0 The sea.\xa0 See see oh playmate, come out and play with me.... [fades out]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 There you have it, folks.\xa0 And now we go to our man in the street interviewer, Tanya.\xa0 Take it away!
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Thank you.\xa0 I'm in a major metropolitan center here, asking people on the street what they think of the Box.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 If they're outside right now, instead of glued to their sets, they must not think much of it.
BOTH\xa0\xa0\xa0 [fake laugh]
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV OFF
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 EATING
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?\xa0 Don't you dare!
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Hey, we were watching that!
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Are you enjoying this?
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Enjoying?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 What do you mean?
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 All this shit they've put those people through!\xa0 You can barely tell them apart now, after they\u2019ve been starved and had their heads shaved.\xa0 They look like concentration camp victims!
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 But - but this is the last show!
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 What does it matter if we watch or don't watch?
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 THROWING DOWN A REMOTE
SON\xa0\xa0\xa0 Do what you want.\xa0 I'll just hope for a six-car pileup.\xa0 Maybe you'll trade up.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS AND SHUT
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 REMOTE TAKEN, TV ON
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 And for tonight, the big surprise is--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DRUM ROLL, OMINOUS MUSIC
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Two boxes!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CANNED CHEERING
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 One for each of you.\xa0 While we get them all set, here's a word from our sponsor!
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 BAR
CROWD\xa0\xa0\xa0 Buzzing "two boxes?"
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 [slurry] Whaddaya think they've got up their shleeves?
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 They're gonna kill one of those boys.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 [confidential] I heard that girl Allison is in a private clinic, barely alive.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Where'd you--?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Internet.\xa0
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sarcastic] \xa0Yeah.\xa0 Then it's probably true.
SOMEONE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Turn it up!
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Got it!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV UP
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 And now.\xa0 The moment of truth!\xa0 All the votes have been tallied.\xa0 As you can see, we have Bart over here in the red box--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 CANNED APPLAUSE
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] --and Carl over there in the blue.
- SHELDON close up on Bart, camera 2. Yeah, baby, clench that jaw.\xa0 Now cut to that trickle of sweat on Carl's face.\xa0 Nice.
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 Back to the announcer?
- SHELDON One more second, and - yes!
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] And now, with the votes tallied, we will find out who you out there have selected as the big winner, and who has to take the big penalty.\xa0
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [real] But first, we caught each of our contestants here on secret camera last night.\xa0 Let's see what they were doing on the penultimate night.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 QUICK JAB OF STATIC
VOICE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] ...need to get out now.\xa0 You don't understand what they have planned for tomorrow.\xa0 It's so much worse!
AMB\xa0\xa0\xa0 BAR
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Who the hell izzat?
BART\xa0\xa0\xa0 [TV] [scoff] Worse?\xa0 Worse how?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't know.\xa0
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Look at that announcer fellow - he's surprised too.\xa0
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 [half a chuckle]\xa0 Serves him right.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] Sorry - we should have screened that clip before playing it.\xa0 Let's go over to Carl's shot.
CARL\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall--[cuts out suddenly]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] And that's all the time we have for that.\xa0 And now the moment of truth.\xa0 Carl or Bart?\xa0 You held their fate in your hands.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 COMMERCIAL COMES ON UNDER
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [coming in]\xa0 Where's Kyle?\xa0 Have you seen Kyle?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 [mesmerized]\xa0 He'll be back.\xa0 Just ... went out to a friend's house.\xa0 Probably.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 You should turn that off and find him!
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 We can look in ten minutes just as easily as we can look now!
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 This is our son!
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 It's almost over!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 OMINOUS MUSIC ON TV
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] And now.\xa0 The final countdown.
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Five minutes.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SHE SITS
ANNOUNCER \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[tv]\xa0 This has been quite a journey for everyone - and we would like to thank you all for your support and participation.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 Support?\xa0 I'd shoot that stupid bastard if I had a chance.\xa0 And a gun.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 You're not the only one, but a lot of people paid a lot of money into that damn show.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] --making us the highest rated network series ever--
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 yeah, and even WE count for ratings, since we happen to be watching it.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 [steaming into an alcoholic rage] Then let's not watch it!
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 SLAMS GLASS ON BAR, LIQUID SLOSHES
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Calm down, pal.
BOB\xa0\xa0\xa0 No! Is this what our world has come to?\xa0 This crap??
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 THROWS BEER GLASS AT TV, TV DIES, BUT OTHER SET PLAYS ON IN THE BACKGROUND
CROWD\xa0\xa0\xa0 [Shocked silence]
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Great, one down, only seven hundred million TV sets to go.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 I'll put it on your tab.
CROWD \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[chatter begins again]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] --will definitely be returning for a second season, starting next fall--
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 DOOR OPENS
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] --and we're looking at celebrity contestants.\xa0
TANYA\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv]\xa0 That will be a whole new ballgame.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Sorry, didn't know it was still on.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [distraught] Stay.\xa0 Please.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Ugh.\xa0 Why?
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 Because I don't think I'll make it otherwise.
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Make what?
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] And now for the final outcome.\xa0
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yes?
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 About time.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv]\xa0 the final results.
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Don't call the police.\xa0 I'll get him home.
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Yeah.\xa0 This time.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 [tv] What we've all been working toward.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [crying] Can't they just say it?
TV, MUSIC SWELLS, THEN CUTS OUT SUDDENLY
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 What?
HELEN\xa0\xa0\xa0 Shit, must have blown the circuit.
DAD\xa0\xa0\xa0 The electricity's still on!
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Is there something wrong with your TV?
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 No!\xa0 It's practically new!
FRED\xa0\xa0\xa0 Come on.\xa0 Quitting time, pal.
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TEST PATTERN NOISE, THEN MUSIC SUDDENLY CUTS BACK IN
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 Thank you all for participating in our experiment.\xa0
MOM\xa0\xa0\xa0 [gasp]
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 As you can see, all of our actors are in perfect health.
JUNE\xa0\xa0\xa0 [sob]\xa0 How could they--?
KATHY\xa0\xa0\xa0 Bastards.
ANNOUNCER\xa0\xa0\xa0 We would love to hear your reactions to this show.\xa0 Please feel free to leave us a message at www-dot-
SOUND\xa0\xa0\xa0 TV SWITCHES OFF
HELEN \xa0\xa0\xa0\xa0[last call voice] Allright.\xa0 That's it.
CLOSER
\xa0
[NOTE:\xa0 George Santayana, author of the quote.]